Our Postmistress.

Just around the corner we have a small Post Office come a-little-bit-of-everything-shop… except it's really an exactly-what -you-don't- want-shop... it has this weird door that says is automatic but you have to push it open… it opens further than you push then it shuts its self very, very slowly, every time I am in the Post Office someone tries to shut the door and the Post Master calls ‘Don’t touch the door’ over and over in his Indian accent… it’s a weird door. Once a dog got in and the Post Master almost had a heart attack… ‘Get that Dog out, Get that DOG out… whose dog is it, who’s is that dog?’ I was feeling quite nervous even though it wasn’t my dog! Both Post Master and Post Mistress are behind safety glass and you don’t even give them what you want to post… you put it on the scales on your side of the glass and then slip your money under a slot, they return your stamps and change then you put your posting into a sack on your side of the glass… I have a feeling bells would go off and shutters would come down if someone tried to be naughty.

We went in there together once after getting a thing in the letterbox saying we need to get a TV Licence… which we still haven’t got because the PO doesn’t give them for less than 12 months and we don’t want to pay for a whole year when we only have 18 weeks left… we have to phone apparently and we only have a mobile which has been costing us a lot.

A couple of weeks ago I went in to post a parcel to Jackson Harry, the Post Mistress, of Indian origin, was very inquisitive but very helpful and we did our business with lots of smiles and nodding.

One week later I go in to post another parcel to Jackson Harry… we do miss him so… the first thing the Post Mistress says to me is… ‘Do you live around here? Do you LIVE around here?? ‘
‘Yes, just around the corner’ I reply.
‘Do you LIVE… HERE??’ She repeats!
I explain about Tom, Emma and Abi and about the little house we are renting and then she says… ‘Do you Like it around here?’ Do you LIKE it around here?????’
I nod and smile and say yes… she is incredulous! ‘DO YOU LIKE it around HERE???’
‘YES it’s a nice little place’ I confirm.
I don’t think she’s deaf, just mystified… I don’t know what views she has of Australians, probably what she’s seen on Neighbours and Home and Away.

Then… ‘Do you drive?’ I say yes, she replies with ‘Do YOU?’ Yes… oh dear have I done something wrong? ‘Do you have a car?’ Yes we do… She raises her eyebrows. ‘You bought a car and you DRIVE!’

I am trying not to laugh but am at the same time becoming just a tad interested in why she’s firing all these questions at me…
‘Do you have Insurance?’ is the next question… when I say yes she looks most crestfallen!
Then she says… ‘Our Christmas Stamps are in!’ Oh good I say.
‘How many do you want?’ she fires at me.

I think she is trying for the title of ‘Salesperson of the Year!’ Now I can’t wait to post another parcel.